Life after the party

Posted by Omar, a humanitarian worker in partnership with Oxfam

Today my two daughters turn seven. I have been saving for months so that I can afford to make their birthday special. There is very little for children to look forward to these days so this is important for both me and for them.

So I invited as many family and friends as possible for their party. But only a few people came in the end. Some of them did not tell me why, perhaps because they did not want to admit to the sad truth - they could not afford to attend this family event or even buy presents. Transport is difficult given the trickle of fuel that is being allowed to enter into Gaza at the moment. This means that travel costs have risen and many families including mine do not have fuel to put into their cars or the money to pay for taxis.

Nonetheless, we had a good time. I was pleased as it has been a long time since we have had such a happy event - there are so many problems around us and little for us to celebrate. My children were delighted and surprised to receive sweets and chocolates that I finally managed to find. I even managed to buy a cake for each of them. I was pleased, as I was unsure that it would be possible. I tried to find apple juice as this is their favourite drink but there was none in the shops.

The shop around the corner from me is famous in Gaza for its cakes. Every time I went there it was brimming with sweet things and bustling with people. When I went there today, the shelves were almost bare and I was the only customer - another reminder of what the blockade is doing to people here. I asked the shopkeeper why there was so little. He replied, " I have had electricity cuts in my shop which makes it difficult to bake. Anyhow, there is no need to make too many cakes, people cannot afford them and if I make too many, they will only go to waste and I will lose money."

I searched for birthday candles but they were nowhere to be found but I managed to find some powder, which comes in a tube and sparkles as you light it. My children's faces lit up when they saw this, their smiles were priceless.

Usually, I buy them clothes on their birthdays but there are hardly any for sale in the markets of Gaza, not even second hand clothes. It is not surprising that people are now making their own clothes out of old ones. As a father, I am sad to say that of late, I buy clothes for my family made from the material that sofas are usually covered in. Carpenters no longer have the wood needed to make furniture because of the blockade has stopped most materials from coming in. So the textiles that were supposed to be used to make furniture is now being used to make garments.

After everyone arrived I put some music on from the small collection we have. Most of us danced around with the children, laughing and smiling as we did so. I was careful not to put the music too loud. I did not want to disturb the neighbours. I feared appearing insensitive to them, having a party at a time of sadness and desperation. It was nice however for an evening to forget all the misery that surrounds us. If I stop and count the days of happiness that we have experienced as a family in the last year, I can count them on one hand. It was important therefore that we enjoyed ourselves and we did.

The day after the events of the night before were almost forgotten, in spite of the fact that this was supposed to be another day of festivities; the day when children celebrate their marks from their last term. I called my kid's teacher to find out how this day would be marked; usually parents gather at the school rejoicing at their children's achievements. He said " this year we have nothing to rejoice, the marks are low and children have almost nothing to celebrate. Not surprisingly, given that they have little food, warmth and security. There are hardly any books for the new term in our schools, children and teachers are stressed by the effects of the blockade and the attacks on our people."

My children who did do well woke up in the morning and looked at me smiling saying " daddy, do not forget to buy sweets for today". There were no sweets in the three shops close to my home nor words to break it to them that most of their friends had failed. As Palestinians, we are proud of the level of education of our people. Now even this is being denied to us.

Later on, on the way back to my office, I heard breaking news that people were killed near my home while they were praying. Immediately I called my wife to make sure that she and the children were OK and to warn them not to go out. I was concerned for their safety. Our windows are made of glass and they vibrate whenever there are incursions, we always fear that they might smash and harm us.

Another dilemma faced me. Do I keep the windows open so that the glass does not fall on them? Or, closed to try and keep them as warm as I can without electricity? I had to make the decision as to which would cause the least harm - these are the kind of decisions that you have to make every day, living in Gaza.